haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
