He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
