I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
