I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
