Screwed.edu
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
