u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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