White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
