he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Randomize
