I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Randomize
