and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
