She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
