i just google imaged poop.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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