Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Randomize
