Do you still have your period?
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
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