dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
