I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
