My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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