he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
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