everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
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