Its about making memories worth repressing
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
