Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
