she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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