Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i would punch a child for taco bell
i just made my gag reflex go away.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize
