May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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