She's JV to your varsity
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
