remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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