I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
thus making me awesome and them whores
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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