5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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