She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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