'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize
