god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
