meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
