Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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