It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
