I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Randomize
