Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
Randomize