is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I think your dad took our porno
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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