i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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