Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
