I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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