Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
