I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
