i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
