Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize