OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
