end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
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