i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
