if i can run in heels then i can drive
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
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