Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
