Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
