What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
