i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize